Back during my divorce, my therapist challenged me with the idea that amid the chaos and craziness that ensues during the course of ending things it is so important to recognize the GOOD, the IMPROVED, the BLESSINGS that exist in our lives, no matter how small, or how insignificant it may seem. Recognizing that we do have good things in our lives allows us to refocus and gain perspective during our rebuilding efforts.
Scream. Yell. Swear.
I haven't felt grateful this last couple of weeks. That melancholy mood I was in hung on too long, but thankfully a migraine came on in and caused my brain to reset. LOL I'm so not kidding. I'm beginning to think that it's the only way my brain knows how to get out of it. I have GOT to work on that to find a better solution!
It's taken me a little bit to figure out what I'm grateful for this week. Of course I'm grateful for my home, and electricity and food, and my car - and even more so for my family and friends. But I think it appropriate to maybe just be grateful for unexpected blessings.
When I was a little girl, one of my favorite movies was Pollyanna - the scene where the Pastor very loudly and full of brimstone and fire shouts out - DEATH COMES UNEXPECTEDLY. It always made me giggle somehow. I could never quite picture our Bishop doing that. In my head, somehow I always heard BLESSINGS COME UNEXPECTEDLY. It's funny because it's so true. I am here to publicly say - I take these blessings for granted. I don't mean to - but I'm sure I am not as grateful for them as I should be. So many times this year when a need has come up - a solution has been found fairly easily. Not just financially, although I would be remiss if I didn't send up a prayer of gratitude in tight financial times - I mean in moments of inspiration, moments of emotional and ego need.
In the past 10 days I have been inspired about many things that I might have otherwise overlooked, opportunities, changes for advancement, 2 a.m. inspiration for a school paper - all things that greatly influence my day to day living. It's made me stop and realize that my Heavenly Father is vastly aware of my needs, and still holding out a hand for me to hold on to or pull myself up with. Maybe it's just that conference is coming, and maybe its that I've got to a specific place in my own brain that has allowed me to accept things - whatever it is, I am extremely grateful for the feelings of renewal and peace that have come to my mind.